Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Putaran Duniaku

"Love is one of the most ridicule topics to be discussed, yet so refreshing and marvelous. Talking about it seems like dreaming, and none of them are not a fairy tale, for each."

After these super devastating weeks, I actually have the chance to renew my blog and write something on it again. And as we see, here, I shared my newest file to be read by you guys.

It started as my task from my Bahasa Teacher. She asked us to make a short-story, which is one of my weaknesses on writing. I repeat, writing short-story is my weakness. I never know how to write such a great story in such a little space, yet I always try to explain every moment in detail.

That is why, my short-story, titled as "Putaran Duniaku" is 15 pages length. Such a long story for a short-story. Some of my friends need time to read it, but overall, they said, it was nice. I don't know if they do like described-kind of short-story, but some of them do.

So, here, I'll let you guys check on it too :)


Today with Father

Today with Father,
It's Friday and he'd come this morning.
When I woke up, he suddenly stood there, asked me to wake up.
We were going to have a breakfast in his favorite place, Lontong Sayur Padang.
Shoot, I just read a message from my classmate, that our basketball match is going to be held today, this morning too.
I didn't have much time, so we both rushed to have breakfast.
My Father, who drove from Jakarta to Bandung before Shubuh, and happily saw me, suddenly has to drive me to school.
I didn't think I could understand how his feelings that time.
Tired, mad, want to cry?
But he smiled anyway.

Today with Father,
The match was cancelled, because our team was late. I felt it was the committee's stupidity fault to let us know in last minutes.
And today was a holiday!
My Father just laughed when my friends greeted him, told me that our opponent won without match. Unfair? Yes.
My Father asked me whether I am going home with him or not, and I said that I will have a group work in my friend's house.
Again, I left him, yet he smiled.

Today without Father,
I went to my friend's house for about three until four hours, yet what we did was not that much.
But I was quite satisfied.
My Father asked whether I am going to have lunch with him, and in the minute when I was going to say yes, my friend told me that her mum already cooked.
Then I said sorry to him, and told him that after lunch, I will come right away to his lunch place.
And I did.

Today with Father,
I was so full that I let him ate alone, and I ate cakes which I bought near the lunch place.
It was so peaceful that I tried to rewind the time again and again.
After lunch, we decided to go back home and straight to the hotel where he is going to have a workshop for 3 days there.
I joined him too.

Today with Father,
We arrived at the hotel, and we both satisfied with the room. The environment was also nice, and I felt like I wanted to sleep all 3 days.
I forgot about where we went after arrived there.
But I was so happy.

Today with Father,
I needed to go to school for extra classes, and my Father had his workshop, so both of us need to go.
All I ever thought at school is about the weekend that I am going to spend with my Father.
I was happy.
I even went to buy my favorite food first before headed to the hotel.
And when I arrived there, he still hasn't finished yet.
It's fine, I can take a nap.

Today with Father,
I had a performance this night, my first one.
And my Father had his dinner with his friends.
Yet he chose to accompany me. How stupid I was that I let him waited for more than three hours because my turn didn't show up.
After I finished, he looked at me proudly, even though my play was suck.
I couldn't stop looking at him, seeking for forgiveness, because in the end, his friends already left the dinner place,
And in the end, I had a dinner with my Father.
It was nice, though.

Today with Father,
My Father woke up early and went to the gym, when I was still sleeping. It was so tiring.
After that, we had breakfast together, and I have to admit that the hotel's food is great.
I was being left alone when my Father had to attend the workshop.
All I did that day were sleeping, eating cakes, working my homework, and watching television, sometimes.
My Father went back to room for praying, and he looked exhausted.
So I tried to sound as little as possible.
At night, he asked me to have dinner together with his friends, when I just ate my order for late lunch.
And the order was super large portion, I even asked him to help me with it.
Because he knew I was so full, he let me stayed at the room and he went to have a dinner with his friends.
Have fun, Father.

Today with Father,
It's Monday, and the government made this day as a public holiday because tomorrow is national holiday.
It was kind of waste, to just work for a day then holiday again.
My Father still had his workshop, and I was still waiting patiently.
I watched, ate, sometimes slept, studied, and watched again.
He finished his whole workshop at 3p.m., and we decided to go out for refreshing at 4.
From a discussion with Mom, we then decided to buy a camera.
At first, Father didn't want to buy one, he just asked me to just have a sight-seeing.
Then I said, why do we even have to go if we are not intending to buy one?
I mean, it will be more hurt if we have planned not to buy it than accidentally don't buy it, right?
And I thought that, if Father doesn't really want to buy one, then we don't have to. I'm fine, I think.
But suddenly, he agreed, because he wanted to go outside.

Today with Father,
At the camera shop, we didn't find the camera that my Father's friend suggested.
We found one of the two options, but Father thought it's too expensive. I didn't care that much, since I am not a pro, so we didn't really need a great camera.
The other option was out of stock, but they have a higher level than that option, which is still a little bit cheaper than the first option, but the gap is not as big as both first options, so it was still expensive.
I thought Father wasn't going to buy the camera, so I told him that it is up to him.
Suddenly, he called his friend, asked for suggestion, and later, he decided to buy the new option that has replaced one of the first options.
I thought it was fine, since it's still cheaper.
And suddenly, the employee told us that the lens is not the usual type of lens for camera, so if we want to use a same kind of lens like the more expensive camera, we have to add more until it was more expensive than the one that we said it was expensive.
I thought Father wouldn't buy it, because what's the point of buying a cheaper one when it gets more expensive?
And he still bought the camera which is actually cheaper, but because we changed the lens, it's more expensive.
I was shocked.
Not only that, when we chose the bag, I thought he might choose the smaller and cheaper one, instead, he bought the bigger, more stylish, and more expensive one.
Started from our low budget to buy a camera, Father suddenly gave his maximum to buy the best one.
I gave him four thumbs up.
We went to the hotel with happy faces, well his was happier.
After that, we had dinner together with his friends, the last dinner.

Today with Father,
It's the last day to stay at the hotel, and we woke quite late today.
As usual, Father went to the gym, I watched television, and we had breakfast quite late too.
After that, we watched "WipeOut" until the Bell-Boy came, and we checked-out.
I think I need one more day to stay. Just one more.

Today with Father,
After checked-out, we went to one of my nearly-like-relatives' house.
We had lunch and chats.
I didn't remember really much,
But I did regret a thing.
That I didn't sit next to my Father all the time.

Today with Father,
We went straight to a supermarket to buy a locking case for the camera to keep it from humidity.
After that, we went to the bookstore to find my brother's present,
But then, Father told me that he can give one of his presents to my brother as a present from me.
I felt happy at first, but now I do regret a thing.
The fact that I didn't let myself to just buy the present that I was planning on giving to my brother.

Today with Father,
We bought tahu brintik after that, and we headed straight home.
Father was planning on going back to Jakarta after Ashar,
But I forbad him. I told him to take a nap first, so he will be fresh in his way to Jakarta.
I just wanted to make him stay longer.

Today with Father,
When Father took a nap, I slept outside of his room, on the living room.
I didn't sleep actually, because I was spying on him.
I was so afraid that he might go back to Jakarta without saying goodbye to me or hug me.
My tears were heavy enough to be held back, but I did.

Today with Father,
It's nearly Maghrib and the land lady came to tell that if I receive a paper for building tax, I should not pay and just give the paper to the land lady.
When she and her brother asked whether my father was here or not, I told them yes but he was having a rest, because he will drive on night road.
They then went off, and my Father has waked up. I was shocked and afraid.
He asked me why I didn't wake him up, and I answered that I am afraid his rest will be disturbed.
He then prayed and asked me whether I need to buy something again.
I told him that I think I need to buy an inhaler, since I couldn't inhale really clear.
But mostly, it was to spend more time with my Father,

Today with Father,
We went to the nearest medicine shop, and bought some medicines.
When he drove me home, I cried quietly, because the more I thought about when he was leaving, the sadder I got.
He then told me to be tough and hug me.
It was raining when I went outside and sent him off.
But shoot,
I didn't hug him.
I cried more.

Today without Father,
I cried quietly in my room, regretting the time that I didn't spend with him.
And I texted him, that I didn't have a chance to hug him.
I felt really guilty not to hug him, yet he hugged me.
And then I wrote this.

It has always been like this. When it's only hours before my parents go back, suddenly there's a switch being on, realizing me that there are only several hours left with my parents.
I suddenly felt stressed and I kept thinking about what it will be like when they already go back to Kalimantan which is so far away from me,
And I forgot about those several hours left with them.
And when the already went back, I kept thinking about last hours I spent with them, and I regret that I didn't spend those hours with them fully, because I kept thinking about when they leave.

And those thoughts, again, fly in my mind.
Thoughts about, what if my parents got an accident after visiting me, and I will never be able to meet them again?
What if my parents got accident when they are going to meet me, and I will never be able to meet them again?
And those thoughts keep coming on their every visit, and they grow stronger each day, which made me more frustrated,
What if because of this insane intuition, I made all of my thoughts come true?
What if because of this thought that keeps growing stronger every day, it came true?
What can I do without them?
Then I will never forgive myself for thinking such kind of thoughts.
I will never ever let myself happy for letting those thoughts becoming true.
I will never forgive myself for taking my happiness away from me.

Please Allah, keep them safe, forever and always.